Uncomfortably Numb

I have a theory that everything changes in a person's life in every two years at most. Ive seen it in my life many times. What I believed was that circumstances change but I didn't think that people change as well ... well I didn't know better... There is no such thing as a constant in our lives. I've seen people change, the ones I thought never could. Its painful to me to look back and see the ones I loved and shared my life with being so selfish. Whose to blame here? me or them ... have I changed as well? I guess I have... for better or worse I don't know One might say I'm the reason of my problem.

This happened a few days ago but it showed me what people are capable of seemingly intelligent and normal people become assholes… the problem is that people think that no one can catch their lies… which is a lie which their brain tells them… so much happened that I cant put into words and don't want to anyway … _____________________________________________ Image deleted on popular demand!

We made this country along with others who were fighting for freedom. It aches my heart to see what it has become. But I don't blame the country… I blame its people who made a mockery of the sacrifices their elders made. Still there are some who want it restored to its intended glory. Here is manifesto of one such group of people ONE PAKISTAN ONE NATION - http://pakcom.com/ We stand for a peaceful, moderate, and liberal Pakistan, with social justice, and equal opportunities. A country with gender equality are ingrained values;  where class structure does not flourish on the basis of economic imbalance;  where quality education is for all not for few privileged, where health and other civic amenities are delivered at people’s doorsteps, where common person has freedom to information, organization, expression. We want to work for a Pakistan which stands against all forms of violence, abuse, and injustice to everyone; where people are conscientious citizens of a welfare state, v

I've been doing an experiment for last week or so and all I can tell you is that I blew it! muhahahaha!…. to be fair the test subject I choose for this was no average person… All I wanted was a decent fun dialogue… but I guess Im that boring… no wonder! and all this sports stuff drives me mad I mean first it was cricket t20 something and Now football I mean come on yaar I know its the world cup but what are you so fraked up about. Pakistan doesn't even have its own team … sigh! Also I want to point out the sheer hypocrisy… I mean more then 40 people died last night in the attack on datta and all you can think of is the fraking football… shame on you as a nation…  I just turned on Geo and there they were … the thumkas! as nothing happened… and an Indian movie on another channel … and then your naive enough to ask why this Azab on our country. I tell you why cause you don't care and wont care until it will come to your door step! Your a dead Nation… the real exp

Things are not what they seem, I learnt that very young. Some say I'm cold and that I don't have feelings. Well this is my answer to all of you. I'm different, I knew that too from an early age, for most of my life I tried to fight it and tried to be like all of you… but now I realize I cant. I am what I am and I'm happy being me! If you don't like what you see blame your perspective I wont try to change myself anymore. It was not easy always hiding behind a veil of stupidity just to fit in. I don't care anymore if none of you cant understand what I'm saying … its your loss cause there are a lot of people in the world that do understand. (I hope!) I always wanted approval from others until I realized that the only approval that I needed was my own. I don't pretend to be the all knowing brat that you think I am, but I do know a lot of things .. All I ever wanted was to share my experience and knowledge… I finally don't blame anyone for the place

Drifted away like the snow flake I choose to be silent screaming tears of lament Say what you said before the most beautiful lie what a sublime present wistful longing heartsick musing the aching baneful sting perpetual untold torment

I did it all. I've seen it all unfold. I know the questions and even know the answers.I grasp the reality of it. I try to hold  on to it. I try to fail. I know the limits. I close my eyes. I try to dream but the nightmare wont let me sleep. what kind of dream is this. Somebody wake me up…Save me! I know what I've lost and I know what I've gained. I keep hoping that it would end this time. How did I end up here looking at the abyss of sorrows. All I want right now is to slowly drift into non existence.  I've had enough. This has to stop.