Uncomfortably Numb

The heart weeps As if it forgot how to beat I close my eyes and see faces Of children in uniforms Drenched in blood The blood of innocence I see that mother Beside that coffin I see that father Kissing the dead hand I see dreams shattered I see futures Being buried I see my son In those faces And I can't hold my tears I can't stop my heart from exploding You who have lost your child I know your pain I weep with you I grieve with you I pray for you

Rohan would have turned 11 this September and when I posted his pic online someone who obviously didn't know about the events of last year asked me who was he and I kept asking myself the same question after that, who was he? Perhaps the more pertinent question is what was he to me? Rohan, was a culmination of prayers, for three years of trying, as all newly weds struggling with conception know how that feels. As if his arrival opened new doors for me, my job at MTA got permanent(after two years of volunteer work)a month after he was born. I remember vividly the moment he was handed over to me that small cuckoon wrapped in soft blue cloth and small baby clothes which his mother had spent weeks preparing. There is nothing like holding your child for the first time, everything about that moment gets etched in your memory forever, the tiny hands and feet, your afraid that you might drop the baby and then the fragrance of Johnson's baby powder. Those small movements the

The worst part is falling and realising that the pedestal one puts one's self on is way higher than it should be. Blind emotion cannot be trusted, action based on emotions lead to disregard of boundaries. Which itself is proof enough of its wrongfulness. It's better to stop when one realises that the path one has taken is the wrong one... Admitting mistakes takes courage but is fruitful, but what off those who got trod upon? Asking forgiveness takes more than courage, it takes character... So much can happen in so little time, the frenzy the adrenaline rush, the high is enough to blind one's self from the obvious.  The choice here is simple, either one applies what is taught to him all his life regarding morality, the difference between right and wrong or when the real test of character comes one just ignores everything and indulges. People give all kinds of reasons for why they choose the wrong path, knowing what it is. It fascinates me that when it c

I hear the argument again and again that Pakistan has no alternative but Imran Khan, he is our last resort. Even so called intellectuals can be found repeating the sentiment. They say, when the intellectuals of a nation abandon principals nothing but chaos and anarchy becomes its fate. There are alternatives if one is looking to avoid total disintegration of every system that is in place, there are alternatives. There always are. 
Instead of rhetoric lets just consider a few facts. Fact is that the current Government along with the previous ones have failed to alleviate the problems of the general public. If you listen to Imran Khan's speech repeated every night for more than a month, the picture he paints of the Pakistani condition is almost accurate. 
Every successful political movement in history started when the masses arose, it is also true that almost every popular revolution was then hijacked by fascists, dictators and were moved away from their true purpose and the pe

Strong as I appeared You were there to lift me up still You saw that I was loosing my mind You gave love of a different kind From a different corner u came Never saw you for real Never touched but could feel But I left so there would be no blame Amazing memories of a time spent Deciphering words for what they meant Distances kept for a reason  Mystic prayers in the midnight sent I see words written in anguish This pain u hold must vanquish For this was but a brief moment Becoming a memory to cherish But moments pass, time moves on So must life for it never stops Nothing stops Nothing lasts forever 

A day before Eid Pakistan gave us a gift, the gift of burning our houses and killing 2 young children, an unborn child and an elderly lady. The gift of celebrating & dancing in the streets on the deaths of our loved ones, the gift of indifference of the Pakistani media & the people, the gift of going to our mosques to pray, under the shadows of guns. This Eid when I woke up to get ready I was in a somber mood, the news of the babies killed by Pakistan last night, the images fresh in my mind, I knew I wasn't going to the Aqsa mosque (the central mosque) where there would be thousands of people and the sweet smell of perfume would make the cool morning air even fresher, all that seems like a distant memory now and a younger generation is already here that hasn't seen an Eid like that ever. No Those days are gone now. When we used to go to our mosques (places of worship) without the shadows of guns. I was going to the mosque just a few houses away from my house due

After witnessing the horrors of what's happening in Gaza, the sentiment I hear over and over again from the youth of Pakistan is that we need another Hitler. I felt really disturbed by this cause it shows the total disconnect our youth and society has from the ideas and concepts of true Islam, which is peace for all. Which can clearly be seen in full demonstration at the time of Fatah Makkah, when all were pardoned regardless of their crimes. We hear the word "Holocaust" used over & over again, sometimes to play the politics of victimization by the aggressor, but regardless that does not diminish the pain, the horror of death and brutality & utter inhumaneness of the actions.  It also does not justify doing the same to others. But to rationalize murder and hatred to cover up our own inadequacy in dealing with our enemies  is cowardice to the highest degree.  I don't care about the details of whether it happened or not or if the accounts were exagge