Trying to fix something that cannot be fixed is a mistake that leads to running in circles of hopeless, endless pain. Although hard to see at the time there is always a simple solution.
Whatever the reasons one has, to endure torment become meaningless when examined through the lens of time. Life, a series of moves and countermoves with destiny, fate and blind chance weaving the tapestry. We make the mistake of assuming anything to be permanent, it is as permanent as we make it our selves, even pain.
To endure cruelty at the hands of another in the name of any emotion is in fact cruelly to one's self. The realities we don't want to confront make us hide, to seek refuge in temporary shelters but we forget that these shelters have no foundation and they crumble at the weakest vibration.
We devise clever ways to bend reason to justify the existence of those shelters and hide their existence but in reality no truth ever needs to be hidden and if it does then whatever the reason might be the actions become wrong.
We live our lives by certain rules, be it Devine or of our own. Still these rules exist for a reason so does the penance for breaking them. We justify breaking the rules by blaming the other, but that's no justification at all, we are not answerable for someone else's sins.
So it all boils down to belief, what does one believe in. If one holds scripture to be absolute authority then the real test of belief is to restrict one's actions when no one else is watching. There is no justification for doing wrong, just regret & the penalty of decay of ones character, becoming something that has fallen from a great hight loosing its purity. This is a problem for those who strive to have moral values, for those with flexible morality it never is.
The allure of breaking the rules, of satiation of desires is laced with the deception of pleasure but in reality is the quicksand which swallows the very essence of faith & the self is engulfed deeper & deeper until nothing remains but sin.
But there is a life line. The answer within us all along, the realisation of the fact that perhaps another reason for ones existence is the constant learning and the evolution of the soul. The realisation that one was not created to be tormented by others, the realisation that the air we breath was created for us by a God who created it long before we ever existed. That for whatever reason we think we must go on suffering is just our fear of survival, that the one who took care of us in the darkness of the womb can take us out of this darkness too. All what's needed is the courage to say enough is enough and if there is no other way then the bravery to part ways.
Instead of looking for solace from idols of our own making why not seek refuge & courage from the source. Instead of looking for shelters from souls who promise but cannot deliver why not seek it from the one who has no limits, whose beauty and magnificence is as boundless as His mercy and love. Instead of falling into the abyss of sin why not repent & bask in his light & blessing for He is all forgiving the one true God, the Almighty Allah.